- I love my jeans and still wear them. Jeans for me are better than any other cut or style of slacks.
- I still sit on the floor when all chairs and couches are full with other people.
- I still love to sing and dance when ever possible.
- I enjoy going to rock concerts.
- I'm still wondering where I will be living in another 6 months.
- I continue enjoy driving.
- I love learning new things.
- I still worry about being alone for the rest of my life.
- I continue to wonder what my future will hold.
- I dream about finding someone to love, be loved by and grow old with.
- I still wonder who I am and what my passion is or if I have one.
Thursday, April 04, 2013
LIFE AT 63
Life at 63 is not quite what I expected it to be when I was 19. When I was 19, 63 sounded so terribly old. Actually it sounded ancient! Now I am 63 and I find I am amazed that.....
Sunday, February 03, 2013
SUPER BOWL SUNDAY!
I have such wonderful memories of many fun Super Bowl Parties at our home in MD. The chili was HOT! The subs were yummy and yes even though it was a church related party the wine and beer was good. Kids were running around the house and there were even a few serious football watchers.
Memories are wonderful but so are the present activities. Today is another Super Bowl Sunday. It's been a lone time since I've been to a Super Bowl Party. It's been even longer since I've seen a Super Bowl with a "local" team playing. When it comes to football I am still a Marylander and when the Redskins are out I become a Ravens fan! To night I am going to my first Villages Super Bowl Party. It will be interesting. I will know only two other people. I will have fun! I will cheer my team and yes there will be chili! Only time will tell if it is as good as our chili was.....I doubt it will be, but I'll give it a chance.
This party won;t be the same as the past ones where I was surrounded by family and good friends, but it will be a new beginning of sorts. New memories will be made and it will be fun!
Memories are wonderful but so are the present activities. Today is another Super Bowl Sunday. It's been a lone time since I've been to a Super Bowl Party. It's been even longer since I've seen a Super Bowl with a "local" team playing. When it comes to football I am still a Marylander and when the Redskins are out I become a Ravens fan! To night I am going to my first Villages Super Bowl Party. It will be interesting. I will know only two other people. I will have fun! I will cheer my team and yes there will be chili! Only time will tell if it is as good as our chili was.....I doubt it will be, but I'll give it a chance.
This party won;t be the same as the past ones where I was surrounded by family and good friends, but it will be a new beginning of sorts. New memories will be made and it will be fun!
GO RAVENS!!!!!!!!
Tuesday, January 29, 2013
MUSIC
I think it really is true that "music soothes the savage beast". I'm not sure where that phrase comes from, but I do believe it is true. Since I was a teenager facing all of the trials and emotions of those tumultuous years music has been something that has spoke to my soul and it did again tonight
I am so blessed to live in a community that has music available every night of the year. Plus it is available not at just one location but three. AND it is free!!!!
I love music. It truly does speak to my soul. I remember when I was a teen my mother used to say she could always tell what my mood was by what music was coming out of my room and that if it was "A Night on Bald Mountain" beware! I also will never forget one night crying my eyes out and feeling that I had no friends and so alone. My father came into my room and told me his song for me was "You'll Never Walk Alone". Yes music has always played a large part in my emotional life.
Tonight I spent the evening with some friends at one of our town squares. We went to hear the music of a band called "3 For the Road". A group 3 guys who meet at our Beatlemanic club and decided to fulfill a life long dream of being in a band. How wonderful to fulfill a dream.AND how wonderful to bring music into the lives of others.
As I listened to their music I covered the range of emotions from sadness to euphoria. Sadness and loneliness at the words of the love songs and euphoria at the songs of celebration and hope. I closed my eyes and while feeling alone also cherished the thoughts that even for me love would one day once again be a reality. I swayed and sang along with the melodies and yes even danced when there was a line dance I knew the steps to.
I love music! It does indeed soothe the savage beast that crouches in my soul.
I am so blessed to live in a community that has music available every night of the year. Plus it is available not at just one location but three. AND it is free!!!!
I love music. It truly does speak to my soul. I remember when I was a teen my mother used to say she could always tell what my mood was by what music was coming out of my room and that if it was "A Night on Bald Mountain" beware! I also will never forget one night crying my eyes out and feeling that I had no friends and so alone. My father came into my room and told me his song for me was "You'll Never Walk Alone". Yes music has always played a large part in my emotional life.
Tonight I spent the evening with some friends at one of our town squares. We went to hear the music of a band called "3 For the Road". A group 3 guys who meet at our Beatlemanic club and decided to fulfill a life long dream of being in a band. How wonderful to fulfill a dream.AND how wonderful to bring music into the lives of others.
As I listened to their music I covered the range of emotions from sadness to euphoria. Sadness and loneliness at the words of the love songs and euphoria at the songs of celebration and hope. I closed my eyes and while feeling alone also cherished the thoughts that even for me love would one day once again be a reality. I swayed and sang along with the melodies and yes even danced when there was a line dance I knew the steps to.
I love music! It does indeed soothe the savage beast that crouches in my soul.
Sunday, January 27, 2013
CORRECT FOCUS
From today's devotional reading:
I continue to be amazed that my devotional readings so often seem to be specifically meant for me at the and show up just when I need them. This today is a keeper. It goes right along with the idea that the past can never be recovered so don't live there. Live in the moments of today. Remember today is called the present!
I also need to remember that my word for 2013 is MOVEMENT. My movement will be forward not back!
"It's not what we've lost which is what is important, but what we have left."
I continue to be amazed that my devotional readings so often seem to be specifically meant for me at the and show up just when I need them. This today is a keeper. It goes right along with the idea that the past can never be recovered so don't live there. Live in the moments of today. Remember today is called the present!
I also need to remember that my word for 2013 is MOVEMENT. My movement will be forward not back!
Tuesday, January 22, 2013
MORE ON ACCEPTANCE
Acceptance seems to be a theme for me at the moment. I have a devotional book I read every morning before getting out of bed. I use it to help me focus on what is important for the coming day. This morning the reading stated:
"Don't waste energy regretting the way things are or thinking of what might have been. Start at the present moment--accepting things exactly as they are--and search for MY way in the midst of those circumstances."
The "My" is Jesus. Yes this mornings reading was I think just meant for me. I still struggle with acceptance of where I am in life. I love FL and I do not regret moving down here. In my heart I know it was the correct move for me, but.....there always seem to be buts.....I need to give up the buts and move fully forward into my future.
Monday, January 21, 2013
RESIGNATION vs.ACCEPTANCE
I'm again reading and finding thoughts I want to remember and be able to refer to. This time the book is Beyond Our Selves by Catherine Marshall. I found this book buried on my bookshelf. It was recommended reading in another book I am using a a daily devotional. I knew I had purchased the book a very long time ago when I saw not only how it had yellowed but that it was priced at $1.50!!!!!
The chapter I read this morning was titled; The Prayer of Relinquishment. From its title I knew it was going to be an interesting read. Relinquishment is not something I find easy. Often I think I am relinquishing something when in fact I am still holding on to a controlling thread or hope of what I want.Part of what Catherine Marshall wrote about here is the difference between resignation and acceptance. I think often I find myself being resigned to a situation or outcome rather than being accepting of it. Here is some of what she says:
"Acceptance is creative, resignation is sterile....Resignation is barren of faith in the love of God. It says 'Grievous circumstances have come to me. There is no escaping them....So I'll just resign myself to what apparently is the will of God; I'll even try to make a virtue out of patient submission.'
So resignation lies down quietly in the dust of the universe from which God seems to have fled, and the door of Hope swings shut.
But turn the coin over. Acceptance says, 'I trust the good will, the love of my God....I know He means to make all things work together for the good, I consent to this present situation with hope for what the future will bring.' Thus acceptance leaves the door of hope wide open to God's creative plan."
At the heart of Faith is not resignation in what is happening in our life but true acceptance that God will take what ever life brings us and make it not only good but better than we can ever even dream of hoping for. This is giving over the control of our own life to the hands of God.
The chapter I read this morning was titled; The Prayer of Relinquishment. From its title I knew it was going to be an interesting read. Relinquishment is not something I find easy. Often I think I am relinquishing something when in fact I am still holding on to a controlling thread or hope of what I want.Part of what Catherine Marshall wrote about here is the difference between resignation and acceptance. I think often I find myself being resigned to a situation or outcome rather than being accepting of it. Here is some of what she says:
"Acceptance is creative, resignation is sterile....Resignation is barren of faith in the love of God. It says 'Grievous circumstances have come to me. There is no escaping them....So I'll just resign myself to what apparently is the will of God; I'll even try to make a virtue out of patient submission.'
So resignation lies down quietly in the dust of the universe from which God seems to have fled, and the door of Hope swings shut.
But turn the coin over. Acceptance says, 'I trust the good will, the love of my God....I know He means to make all things work together for the good, I consent to this present situation with hope for what the future will bring.' Thus acceptance leaves the door of hope wide open to God's creative plan."
At the heart of Faith is not resignation in what is happening in our life but true acceptance that God will take what ever life brings us and make it not only good but better than we can ever even dream of hoping for. This is giving over the control of our own life to the hands of God.
Sunday, January 20, 2013
ON LIFE AND DEATH
I'm back home after an unexpected trip to Michigan for a family funeral. Funerals are never a fun thing to take part in, but they are a part of life. At some point we all will be involved in one. There is no avoiding them. Part of living is dying. That's just a fact.
What makes family funerals or even those of friends bittersweet is that they often bring people who have been apart back together. That was the case with this funeral. It was for the husband of a cousin of mine. When we were younger the three of us were quite a trio. We did lots together and enjoyed each others company long before any marriages took place. My cousin and I grew up almost more as sisters than cousins. Then in late high school her boyfriend (who later became her husband) joined us, Years went by, children were born, and I moved with my husband to a new state. Eventually the distance of miles took us on different paths and we were no longer close,
I've always felt guilty about letting the friendship lapse, but I guess never enough to do anything about it. We had our own lives and our own problems. In our youth these problems would have been shared and we would have gained strength from each other, but no longer. That is until a death.
I knew I had to go back for the funeral. It didn't matter if the money was not available; a credit card was. It didn't matter if there were meetings and plans that needed to be changed. It didn't matter that we hadn't seen each other in over 6 years. It didn't matter that we hadn't even talked to each other in over 3 years. It didn't matter that I was going from 75 degree sunshine to 30 degree snow showers. I knew I had to go! I had to support my cousin and honor her husbands life. So I went.
Yes it was a time of sadness, but it was also a celebration of love. The love of a brother for his sister; a grandfather for his grandchildren; a father for his children and most of all a husband for his wife. Gil knew what it meant to love and all he loved knew without a doubt that they were loved. I was assured that I was loved as well.
Yes death is a part of life. Though it is the end of life for the one who has died and it changes dramatically the lives of those left behind there can be a positive change. Death causes separation, but it can also bring together. I hope that I have reconnected with family that I have been separated from for too long.
What makes family funerals or even those of friends bittersweet is that they often bring people who have been apart back together. That was the case with this funeral. It was for the husband of a cousin of mine. When we were younger the three of us were quite a trio. We did lots together and enjoyed each others company long before any marriages took place. My cousin and I grew up almost more as sisters than cousins. Then in late high school her boyfriend (who later became her husband) joined us, Years went by, children were born, and I moved with my husband to a new state. Eventually the distance of miles took us on different paths and we were no longer close,
I've always felt guilty about letting the friendship lapse, but I guess never enough to do anything about it. We had our own lives and our own problems. In our youth these problems would have been shared and we would have gained strength from each other, but no longer. That is until a death.
I knew I had to go back for the funeral. It didn't matter if the money was not available; a credit card was. It didn't matter if there were meetings and plans that needed to be changed. It didn't matter that we hadn't seen each other in over 6 years. It didn't matter that we hadn't even talked to each other in over 3 years. It didn't matter that I was going from 75 degree sunshine to 30 degree snow showers. I knew I had to go! I had to support my cousin and honor her husbands life. So I went.
Yes it was a time of sadness, but it was also a celebration of love. The love of a brother for his sister; a grandfather for his grandchildren; a father for his children and most of all a husband for his wife. Gil knew what it meant to love and all he loved knew without a doubt that they were loved. I was assured that I was loved as well.
Yes death is a part of life. Though it is the end of life for the one who has died and it changes dramatically the lives of those left behind there can be a positive change. Death causes separation, but it can also bring together. I hope that I have reconnected with family that I have been separated from for too long.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
