Saturday, August 06, 2011

READING ALOT!

Yes, I am, reading a lot these days.  I don't sleep so might as well read and then that puts me to sleep for an hour or two then I wake again and read again and repeat the cycle.  I'm also trying to read books I don't really want to move but do want to read.  Most of them hav e been on my shelf for way to long. I just finished a book that I remember years ago that someone , I think it was Stephanie, told me was really bizarre.  It's Our Lady of the Lost and Found by Diane Schoemperlen.  It's a bout a visit by the Virgin Mary to a writer, and yes it was rather bizarre.  Not so much for the story, but more how it was written.  However, as is usual when I read lately I found a quote in it that I don't want to lose.  So here it is.

"....the hardest person in the world to forgive is yourself.  And..the hardest person in the world to have faith in is also yourself.  I am still trying to reconcile who I am now with who I was then.  I know my former self is still there, waving to me through time just like a phantom limb.  I am still trying to figure out how I am both am and am not the person I was then, the person I appear to be now, the person that I think I am; how I both am and am not the person that I will eventually become.  If who I am now is the "real" me, than who was the person I used to be; an impostor, a fugitive in disguise, the out -of-focus shadow of my future self?  If who I am now is the :real" me, than who is the person I will be twenty or thirty years from now?"

Yep?  Just who was I, who am I and who will I become?????

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